When couples begin to contemplate marriage, it is common to ask the important questions: Can we see ourselves together forever? Do our future goals align? Do we want to have a family? Do we want to live in the same place? Do we have similar perceptions on life? Does our faith align? If an incorrect response is decided, then perhaps the relationship is not meant to last “until death do us part.”
As someone who is engaged, I admit that my fiancé and I have gone above and beyond for marriage prep. For the last 2 years, we have read dating, marriage, and Christian relationship books together. We focus on each other’s love languages, complete devotions together, and ensure that we have talked about even the minor things that will need to be addressed when the “big day” is over and we actually start a life together.
However, even through all of that prep, we had never covered certain questions…questions I highly doubt anyone asks in a dating relationship, not even the people who prep as much as possible to ensure that they will marry someone they are best compatible with.
What questions am I talking about?
- What color do you want our bathroom to be?
- What knife set do you like?
- What style of comforter will you want for our bedroom?
- What kitchen appliances do you find are necessary?
You agree with me, right? Who asks these things?
Well, this past weekend my fiancé and I started our registry per recommendation of our wedding coordinator, and it was an experience. To start, we actually got to walk around with a scanner like people in the movies do. Not to mention, this was just one more step we were taking toward our life together.
Yet when it came time to actually scan items, things got interesting. My fiancé and I both just moved to Colorado and needed to purchase a lot of home goods. We had both lived with roommates previously who had the majority of the “supplies,” and since we had both moved in our cars, we decided to purchase the majority of those items as needed. This meant running to the dollar store for a strainer, measuring cups, knives (yes, they are quite difficult to use at times…), and much more. Our kitchens are stocked with the bare minimum and that bare minimum lacks quality. So, although the majority of bloggers are now recommending to register for experiences, we decided we still need to register for home items.
That being said, we did ask each other those questions that neither of us had thought of. And as we wandered through the store, I was pleased with our decision making skills. Neither of us were completely set on particular styles, so it was easy to compromise. My fiancé did find some items he thought were “cool” and quick scanned them, giving me a sly look. I laughed and let him add them.
You see, the registry process was fun, but it was most definitely a learning opportunity. I was able to learn a little more about my future husband’s preferred decor taste, and I also learned that all of the difficult decisions we have made in the past made choosing plates, towels, and kitchen appliances much easier.
Want some registry tips? Here they are:
- Prepare, not by skimming Pinterest, but by working together as a team throughout your relationship.
- Give and take. Perhaps he can choose the style of one room, and you choose the style of another.
- Have fun! This is moving you one step closer to a life together by choosing items you will have in your home for a very long time. Enjoy each moment.
I highly doubt we will keep all of the items we scanned on our registry, and I know we will also go to other stores as well to add additional items. I also highly doubt we will receive a majority of the items we registered for. However, it was a new experience…
and yes, it was a lot of fun.